As an adoptee myself, I understand what it’s like to be born with a story that comes with a lot of unknown parts. Every adoption case is different, and it can be tricky trying to navigate all of the feelings and emotions that come up surrounding such a personal experience.
It’s not uncommon for adoptees to feel a little lost, or feel a general dissatisfaction. They may have curiosities about their genealogy and ethnicity. These feelings are completely natural. We have a desire to know where we come from— especially since we live in a world full of DNA kit commercials.
Adoption is generally viewed as a positive experience in our society, as it gives many couples an opportunity to have a family who otherwise could not. While these positive experiences are certainly a big part of adoption, it doesn’t mean adoptees don’t have questions. I believe it’s important to take the space for yourself to examine those conflicted feelings and find your voice.
In her article entitled “10 Things Adoptees Want You to Know,” Leslie Johnson discusses why it can be difficult for adoptees to talk about their struggles. She writes:
When we are young, we don't have the ability to identify our experience and articulate our feelings. As an adoptee gets older, if no one is talking about adoption, we get the sense that our feelings won't be understood or validated.
I think it’s important to keep this in mind. What we experienced as children has a lasting effect on us, especially if we grew up at a time when adoption was more secretive. We now understand the value of being open about adoption, but that doesn’t necessarily make it easier for us adult adoptees.
If you’re interested in doing in-depth work focusing on your adoption, please reach out to me.
What’s your story? I’m here to help you explore it.